Needs vs Wants

A while back, there was a bit of hooplah in IVV about people asking for or not giving help. The base problem was availability but also interpretation -- people are less likely to help with a Want than a Need.

• Instances while leveling are a Want. You do not need instances to level. If you are lucky enough to have someone willing to run you through something, that's awesome. Otherwise, suck it up.
• Heroics are a little different. Need depends on gear drops in light of raid requirements and whether or not you can find a comparable piece elsewhere (craft/rep) that is soloable. Everything else, even emblem farming, is Want. If all you need is emblems, be available for other people's runs, but you don't have the right to badger 4 other people to go somewhere specific.
• Achievements are Wants. Sorry, folks. I like achievements as much as anyone, but nobody is going to feel pressured to stop doing dailies to help kill turkeys or even, as one (now former) IVV member expected, form a fresh raid to kill the faction leaders.
• Mount, pet, and rep farming are Wants. I like cosmetic items and nice high reps too, but they are a luxury, not a right.
• PVP is a Need when you're camped and have no options but to sit there. If you have a choice in the matter, it's a Want. You aren't entitled to backup if you can get away.
  
• Activities suggested out of boredom are not and will never be Needs. They are Wants. Period.
• Class skills are a Need. It's pretty hard to do anything if you're working with level 44 spells in Outland.
  
• Riding skill is a Want. I'm in Outlands on a 60% speed mount on Moon Guard for my mage. If I can handle that, you can handle the slow flyer.

Managing Wants

Your guild gets more use out of the guy doing his Hodir dailies for the shoulder enchant than your Wants. Therefore, it's actually more beneficial to the guild when people ignore Want requests.

Family guilds inevitably try to help each other within reason. But Wants are luxuries. If you get help for them, you are lucky and should be very happy for all the nice helpful people around you. But it is unreasonable to think that you are entitled to help for your Wants. You are not.

The best method is to find other people with Wants and team up. Even if your Wants don't mesh, agree to help each other anyway. This gives you the numbers you need, even if you have to do some things you have no interest in.

Managing Needs

If you Need something, make that clear to the people around you. Don't just say "I need this," either. That's sloppy, lazy, and not at all persuasive.

If you have a Need, first tell people why you need it. "I want to run X" will get you ignored while "X has the bow I've been farming to raise my dps by Y points for Z raid boss" will get some interested people going "Well, I can't help now, but if you can wait until ___..." and others ready to jump on the bandwagon immediately (often those with Wants in the same area). The first request implies that it is a Want request, while the second assures everyone that your request is a Need because you've done your homework on it.

A good guild will go out of its way to fulfill your Needs if you let everyone know about them. A method my guildmates use sometimes is putting their current Need in their forum signature. Another good way is to whisper someone who has connections (for example, whispering me or Jon would be a good way to get a group for a Need, since we have family connections we can pull in).

Most Needs can be handled solo, but at some point you'll require the help of others. And when that time comes, you must convince them that your Need is really a Need. And then they'll pay attention to you.

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Beth Blevins is a former officer of In Vino Veritas.
She's a writer and likes to help with mount farming.
Beth's been married since her junior year of college.